Loathsome Sores

 

Then his wife said to him, “Do you still hold fast your integrity?  Curse God, and die.”

 

Job 2.9

 

 

You may have noticed over the years that I am not always as steady on my feet as I might wish to be.  You may even have thought to yourself, “He needs to take more water with it.”  However, I can assure you that my unsteadiness is in no way related to the consumption of alcohol.  It dates from a sporting accident that I had in my teenage years, which required a long period in an orthopaedic ward, five operations involving bones and bits of steel, and quite a period of time before I could even walk again properly without a stick.  As people will tell you, if you have ever had a trauma to joints in your body, even if you appear to make a full recovery – which I did – eventually the orthopaedic chickens will come home to roost.  Can you hear the faint sound of clucking?

 

I lay in a bed for many weeks in an Oxford hospital and there were times when I thought that I should never walk again, which was a sobering thought for a teenage lad who had reached the age when chasing girls seemed to be a good idea.  How can you chase girls when you cannot even walk?  However, there was not one single moment when I cursed God for what had happened to me.  Then his wife said to him, “Do you still hold fast your integrity?  Curse God, and die.”  It was not God’s fault.  It was not Satan’s fault.  It was my fault.  No… if anything, when I got downhearted, I remembered that story of Jesus healing the crippled man let down through the roof by his friends: I say to you, rise, take up your pallet and go home.  One day, I used to think, I shall do just that.

 

Can you afford to be so apparently noble or optimistic when you have a condition that you know will never get better?  Now, that may well be a different matter, although we all suffer from the condition known as mortality.  We know that that will never get “better”, in the course of the normal run of things, as far as the ending of our life is concerned.  Obviously, eventually, we are all going to die.  But here we are thinking more of conditions like blindness.  My grandfather went blind when he was just turning fifty, in an age when there were no drugs to control the blood pressure which often used to cause the blindness.  Because of that, I greatly fear blindness.  All my books, which I have loved for so long, would be closed to me.  Driving an Italian sports car would no longer be possible.

 

With British forces engaged in wars overseas, conditions that will never be reversed are the result of daily injuries – blindness, perhaps, and loss of limbs, general mobility and the use of hands.  Prosthetic limbs may restore some ability to face everyday life, and the example of Douglas Bader probably still inspires those so injured.  Bader, after all, still played golf with two artificial legs – and flew a fighter aircraft!  But it is not the same as the way that God made you.

 

The story of Job and his afflictions opens with the episode of the challenge of what appeared to be irreversible disfigurement with constant pain.  This is awful even to contemplate.  Was this likely to have been leprosy?  Perhaps it was some other chronic skin infection, disease, or condition.  Was Job’s wife not therefore reasonable in asking him: “Do you still hold fast your integrity?  Curse God, and die.”  The significance of the instruction lies in the belief at the time that if you were to curse God, he would bring about your immediate death, which, in Job’s case, would bring an end to his unendurable pain.  These days, if you cannot face living, you do not have to bother to curse God in order to die – you just have to go to Switzerland.

 

In the nineteen-sixties, Paul Simon wrote the famous folk song, “The Sound Of Silence”, and he and Art Garfunkel sang it.  In a sense, it was a counterpoint to Bob Dylan’s “The times they are a-changing”.  It was a song of angst-ridden youth and of the lonely disaffection of contemporary urban living, and it contained the immortal line, “The words of the prophets are written on the subway walls.”  Well, I saw the words of the prophet quite recently on the London Underground.  They were in the form of a piece of graffiti scrawled on a poster advertising the sort of religious course, like Alpha, which promises to give you the secret of life, the universe, and everything, in several easily digestible sessions.  The poster had on it the question, “Is there a God?” and underneath in large letters were three possible answers: Yes, No, and Probably.  After the Yes, somebody had added, “and it is a sadist.”  When you read the Book of Job, you could be forgiven for agreeing with that sentiment.  But note carefully the exact words which suggest total despair: It is a sadist.  In the piece of graffiti, although the writer affirms that he believes that there is a God, not only does he then suggest that God is wilfully vindictive, but he also removes any possibility of seeing God as a personal being – It is a sadist.  Now that is despair indeed.

 

I have to confess that that piece of graffiti shook me considerably.  Initially, I wondered if it had been a smart, glib, throw-away line scrawled by some smug atheist.  But I thought probably not.  This was not just a philosophical witticism.  It was an emotional response to a real personal tragedy.  I tried to imagine the sort of person who might have written it.  Was he suffering from loathsome sores, like Job?  Was he in constant pain, with no possibility of improvement, but just a slow decline until the darkness overcame him?  Did he have a wife like the wife of Job?  Then his wife said to him, “Do you still hold fast your integrity?  Curse God, and die.”

 

I began to imagine the possibilities.  Perhaps it had been written by somebody on the way home, having received news of a terminal condition from his doctor, and the smugness and the simplistic idiocy of the poster was too much for him to bear.  Perhaps it had been written by somebody who had received devastating news, not about themselves, but about someone whom they loved, dearly and deeply… a wife, a parent, perhaps even a child.  For the suffering of children is the most grievous thing to contemplate or to witness.  After the shock and the anger and the despair, in such circumstances, what do you do then?

 

I have been called many things in my life, but one of the most interesting emerged when a tutor at my theological college accused me of being a Stoic rather than a Christian.  Do you remember who the Stoics were?  They came, of course, from Stoic Newington… No, they didn’t!  They were ancient Greek philosophers who maintained that there was complete nobility and virtue in meeting and resisting suffering, both physical and mental, and all the disappointments in life, without any emotion whatsoever.  We still say of people, “He accepted his fate stoically.”  The most striking example of stoicism in a film occurred near the beginning of “Lawrence of Arabia”.  Do you remember the scene?  Lawrence, played by Peter O’Toole, has struck a match in front of somebody in his office and demonstrates how to extinguish it by sliding his thumb and forefinger up the shaft of the match until the flame goes out.  The man who witnesses this, aghast, asks Lawrence what the trick is in doing this.  Lawrence replies, “The trick is not minding that it hurts.”

 

My reply to the accusation that I was a Stoic was to say that my intention was to exercise Christian fortitude when confronted with suffering, because if I myself was not prepared to try to do this, how could I encourage the members of the church whom I was trying to serve to do it?  Since those days lying in a hospital bed (forty-five) years ago, I have always held the opinion that, in life, you have to play the cards that you have been dealt.  Life is not a card game where you can exchange one or two cards with the dealer.  It is not a game of Scrabble where you can miss a turn and exchange all the tiles that you don’t like.  You have to play what you have been dealt.  Which is better?  To be constantly trying to horse-trade with life for insignificant advantages, or to face life with a Christian hope, trusting that if God cannot or will not remove its trials for your sake, then he will at least give you the courage to face them, and to live through them, even if, at they end, they appear to have defeated you.

 

That is the story of the Passion of the Christ, is it not?  It is the story of Gethsemane.  It is the story of Calvary.  But if you read the Gospel story to the end, what appears to be the end isn’t the end!  Evil does not win… eventually.  Suffering does not win… eventually.  Death does not win… eventually.  People who believe in resurrection can afford to trust the power of God’s Holy Spirit to give them the courage to live a life of Christian fortitude.

 

Of course, Job was not a Christian.  He wasn’t even just a Stoic.  When his wife said to him, “Do you still hold fast your integrity?  Curse God, and die,” Job decided that life was too precious to take her advice.  He decided that integrity was more significant than suffering, and that giving reverence to God was more significant than his own personal fate.  Originally, Satan had effectively said to God, “All men have their price of divine betrayal.”  Yes, we probably do.  But let us set the value of the life that God has given us infinitely higher that the price of betraying it.  What else can we do with integrity?  Play the cards that you have been dealt, and, as a Christian, by the grace of God, you might just win.  In the end – as a Christian – by the grace of God, you will eventually take the rubber.